I'm coming back from a long absence in my posts with a double feature today. Part one, we'll look at a company called World Ahead Publishing. They fancy themselves as "The West Coast's Leading Conservative Publisher". I'm going to repeat that. On the west coast. I'm going to go out on a limb here and say that they are more or less the only conservative publisher on the west coast. Anyway, they've just put out their latest book:
In case you can't tell, that's Hilary Clinton grabbing at a piggy bank. Next to her is Ted Kennedy, who seems to be... gasp... talking. Next to him is a donkey in a suit holding a microphone for Kennedy to speak in to, because liberals talking, and letting other liberals talk, is apparently one of those signature reasons that liberals are so out of whack.
Let's take a look at that piggy bank again. Why? Because it's a good point of departure. The imagery of a democrat grabbing for someone else's money is one that the punditry on the right has been trying to push since the tax increase in the early '90s. You see, increasing taxes means that evil godhating unamerican liberals are trying to take YOUR hard earned money away so that they can buy more "socialism" (the right says this word so as not to sound like Joe McCarthy, they mean communism). Remember what happened last time we had a tax increase? Remember how everyone in the country lost out economically throughout the '90s? Oh, wait... no... that was from 2000 to the present... my mistake. Well... at least the economic hardship was from 2000 to the present. We haven't had any tax hikes. We have had a bunch of cuts though, which is the Republican soapbox on this issue. See Democrats are evil and take your money to fund petty things like the Pax Americana while Republicans are the good guys that give you more money to fend for yourself. Wow, Hilary must be a bitch trying to get at our money. I mean, if she had been anywhere near the leadership during the Pax Americana, then maybe I'd give her the benefit of the doubt, but.... oh.... right....
Of course, most people on the right can't get enough of this book. Rush Limbaugh, for example, has said of it "Our hat is off, here, to Katharine DeBrecht, the author of Help! Mom! There Are Liberals Under My Bed.", while the likes of Alan Colmes (a former stand up comic who FOX pretends is some sort of a knowledgable liberal when, in fact, he's just a big pussy) says that it is "Brainwashing!". Of course, this is allowed on the book's site because: "Coming from a liberal like Alan, we take that as a compliment!" I'm not going to get started tearing Alan a new one, since I'm pretty sure Hannity is busy doing something with his current one; however, I will repeat that Colmes is a big pussy who neatly fits the right's stereotype of the wishy washy liberal who nobody likes. Seriously, if Stuart Smalley can stand up to Hannity, why can't Colmes? I mean a big... big pussy.
This new fad in Republican publishing seems to be "get 'em while they're young", with even Bill O'Reilly putting out an "O'Reilly Factor For Kids" which is subtitled "How to boycott Jamie's lemonade stand". It isn't really subtitled that, but I kind wish it was. Yes, yes, the Republicans are taking a page from their dear friends over at big tobacco, and have sought out to bullshit to people as early as possible. At the very least, this means that kids who have this shit forced down their throat by their oh-so concerned parents will grow up not having any clue what an honest statement or policy sounds like. If you've only had bullshit all your life, then you won't even recognize a sandwich... unless it's some kind of a bullshit sandwich. The end result? Democrats are just as bad as Republicans in the apathetic voting-age citizen regardless of who's been running the congress since 1994, and who hasn't. Oh, also these writers will make an ass load of money on the side, not a bad perk.
There should be some sort of shitty liberal response kids book, something like "Help! Dad! Mom's indoctrinating me in to a rhetorical machinery of synergistic lies that somehow manages to convince their followers that what they're doing is actually other people's fault!". That probably wouldn't sell as well though.
Other books published by World Ahead Publishing:
Thank You, President Bush
Reflections on the War on Terror, Defense of the Family, and Revival of the Economy
Global Deception
The UN's Stealth Assault on America's Freedom
an excerpt from that gem: "Kofi Annan's method? Ensnare the United States in a web of complex and insidious treaties, protocols and covenants that legal impede our ability to act in our own interests. His target? Your freedoms."
yeah, it says that these protocols and covenants legal impede. I wonder why the right is considered less intelligent and undereducated so often?
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