Tuesday, May 17, 2005

When PETA Attacks

The Lincoln Park Zoo is wonderful year-round public zoo on the lakefront in ultra-expensive (some have even rumored pretentious) Lincoln Park, Chicago. In the past year, however, roughly jesus-kabillion animals have died or been euthanized due to mysterious reasons. A camel, a gorilla, monkeys, two elephants, and one more elephant that died en route to a zoo in Utah from Lincoln Park Zoo. The protesters at PETA weren't going to let this stand. That camel, apparently, was being subjected to the arctic blasts of Lake Michigan in the winter... as if not a single other animal at the zoo might have a problem with something like that... take for example... any of the other animals that didn't die. One elephant was apparently old as hell, the other had elephant TB. The Gorilla's kidney failed. None of this is acceptable behavior for the animals, or the zoo, says PETA spokesman Debby Leahy, "It's unheard of for one zoo to have this many animal deaths over such a short period of time, I believe three elephant deaths in six months is a national record."
That's right. If you're gonna run a zoo... and it's gonna be around for a long time... you better be damn sure to treat your animals ethically by shipping them off to various other zoos just before they die so that you don't go setting any death records. PETA (People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals) alleges to be concerned with treating animals well. How is sending an elephant to Utah so that it is not the only elephant in the zoo wrong? How is euthanizing an animal with kidney failure so barbaric? It seems that the zoo reacted just as any member of, well, PETA, would have. But no no, too many animals at once for the good folks at PETA to deal with. We're talkin' RECORD SETTING! This is, apparently, morally relevant.
Now to the important stuff. These protesters have their beef, and hell, maybe there is some conspiracy to treat animals unethically... who knows? But, if I might draw your attention up to the photo above... see the protester dead center in the shot? Now, granted, three elephants did die at the zoo since October... but I seriously doubt they'd agreed upon anything in life, much less death. Furthermore, who the fuck is bell? Best guess I have is that she means Kevin Bell, CEO and President of the Lincoln Park Zoo. Apparently when you run a zoo... that would be a massive habitat for nearly every animal in existence... and a few of your animals get old, sick, or whatever, all in the same year... and die from... stuff... then apparently PETA wants your ass on a stick. To the lady in the center shot: Those elephants did not agree that the president and CEO of the zoo needs to leave, their deaths do not imply that he should leave, and your holding up a sign that fails to make the allegedly tragic deaths of the three elephants as well as your loathing for the CEO of the zoo a catchy slogan (you hypocritical insensitive fuck) sure as shit doesn't imply that he should leave

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